Broken Wings

“It’s hard to forget,

I wish there was a solution,

Don’t spend your time in confusion

I’ll turn back now and spread

My broken wings”

I always found this song, which is the soundtrack of the anime series “Trinity Blood” to be interesting. Its appeal lay in it’s simplicity and it’s theme of moving on in spite of bad memories and mistakes.

We all make mistakes. Some mistakes are fun. Some not so much.  Some mistakes haunt us and keep haunting us as we grow up. This last category of mistakes tends to fester within us and give rise to anger. I speak from experience and from taking a few antidepressants.

The entire thing is summed up in a quote from M.A.S.H. “Anger turned inwards is depression.” I found that to be apt too.

Followers of my blog know about my dropping out and the trouble I had with a serious yet not critical depression last year and one day, I remember sitting myself down and asking myself if I was truly done with things. I mean to say at 19, was I so self satisfied that I had no loose ends to tie up or no new things to see, video games to play?

Were my parents that bad? Didn’t they teach me to read? Didn’t they introduce me to music?

It soon dawned on me that I was a fool. I was a fool to let something like a minor yet serious depression bog me down for so long.

And so, I fought back.

This post isn’t about me though. It’s about those with broken wings like mine. The people out there who have, through no fault of their own been haunted by the mistakes they made or circumstances that weren’t in their control.

Don’t worry, and don’t give up.

As Hawkeye said, (and to follow are two MASH quotes)

“Don’t let that bastard win”

And as Sherman Potter said, “The part of you that wants to hold on is stronger than the part that just wants to end it all”

The Bilge Master