The Games That Defined This Decade- A Guest Post by Sujayendra Krishna Nellore

Sujayendra Krishna Nellore is a friend of mine I met online in a gaming group, which he was the admin of. We had similar tastes in gaming and hit it off. He runs a Core i7, with 16GB RAM and an NVIDIA GeForce GTX1070. He also games on his PS4. This is his take on the games of the decade, encompassing 2010-2019. Please welcome Sujayendra to the blog and here's hoping we see more from you in the years to come!

The Bilge Master

The Games That Defined This Decade

By Sujayendra Krishna Nellore

As another decade draws to a close, let us pause for a second and look back on the decade that was in video games.

In December of 2010, a 19 year old me leaned forward to stare at the screen as Bethesda Softworks boss Todd Howard took to the stage at Spike Game Awards. A seemingly compact man, Howard looked like he was bursting at the seams, and barely got through the prepared speech before revealing a bombshell: The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim was announced, showcased, and scheduled to release on 11.11.11.

I wept with joy.

2010 to 2019 is easily the biggest decade of the video game industry. Video games went from being disregarded as childish technobabble to becoming the center of mainstream pop culture. The sudden change in the status quo has been difficult to digest for some – even as we speak there are fully grown men bullying others for playing the games they consider to be childish. Gaming has also been a focal point in the rise of the alt-right, a global neo-nazi movement that used GamerGate in 2014 as a recruitment ground.

Much to their horror, however, gaming has continued to grow at a rapid pace. While there are always going to be the incoherent rants of people desperately clinging to their status quo, video games are a unifying force. And some of them are better than the others.

With the following several words, I’ll attempt to collect the best game of each year this decade. Of course, opinions deeply vary, and I do believe mine are quite aligned to the mainstream video game industry, so feel free to drop your favourite in the comments below.

2010 - A Tie Between Mass Effect 2 and Red Dead Redemption

This decade was off to a running start with EA and Rockstar Games – titans of the industry, releasing two memorable games that remain close to many a heart even today. With Mass Effect 2, pre-misfortune BioWare successfully released a competent follow-up that met fan expectations and put the series on the global map.

Rockstar Games, on the other hand, were quiet about their spaghetti western open-world game. Designed by Rockstar San Diego, Red Dead Redemption was a glimpse into the decade that would be in video games. The game swam its way to high scores and heaps of praise on the backs of powerful performances by the cast, as well as a unique take on western games that maintained the immersive cowboy experience throughout its runtime. Oh, and it introduced the world to John Marston.

2011 - The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim

To understand Skyrim’s cultural impact on mainstream pop-culture, one just has to look at the millions of videos on YouTube, references to the game in various forms of entertainment media, and look at the tweets from early 2012.

While there have been several games that pushed the medium forward in 2011 – this is the same year Portal 2 and Battlefield 3 came out, Skyrim was everywhere. It was in TV commercials, celebrities were talking about it, YouTube channels featuring the game went viral overnight. Even in 2019, there are still people who lose themselves in the calming world of Skyrim.

Bethesda, like BioWare, has also lost favour with fans over the last few years. With the disastrous launch of Fallout 76, and their continued efforts to make it worse for players, the next decade will be a litmus test to an impatient fanbase’s tolerance levels with this storied studio.

2012 - Dark Souls

When Demon’s Souls launched for the PS3, it was hailed as a return to old-school gaming. Purists decried the modern ‘hand-holding’ of video games and hailed Fromsoft’s return to the fold as one of the greatest games ever made. I’m unsure how the From Software, a Japanese company without much experience in the west, viewed their success, but it was enough to launch Dark Souls in 2011 for Xbox 360 and PS3.

It wasn’t until August of 2012, when the game launched on PC. The rest is history.

You see, Dark Souls launched on PC at a time when streaming was steadily gaining popularity. People thronged in the millions to see their favourite streamers fail at the game, and it was all the marketing From Software needed. The community around FromSoft games today is one of the best in gaming circles – despite the cavalcade of smug know-it-alls who wouldn’t help you with the game without going ‘oooohhh I’m not gonna tell you what happens, figure it out!’

Beneath the depressive visuals and tough-as-nails enemies however, was a solid game with fantastic control mapping. It rewarded the wackiest of strategies and pinpoint precision. The trend to recreate the success of Dark Souls has led to a whole new genre of video games called ‘Souls-like’, and prompted YouTubers, Games Journalists, and even gamers to compare every tough game to Dark Souls for the rest of the decade.

It is my Game of the Decade. Only one other game comes close to being this influential over the course of these 10 years.

2013 - The Last of Us

It is safe to say nobody anticipated just how massive The Last of Us would eventually end up being. If Red Dead Redemption signalled a shift to a more serious, character driven storytelling in video games, The Last of Us was the proof of concept. It was clear, undeniable proof of the power of stories told in an interactive medium. One would say this was slightly ironic, since GTA V released on last generation consoles in the same year. The student had surpassed the master.

Game Director Bruce Straley and Creative Director Neil Druckmann became heroes overnight as the reviews started rolling in. They were the golden boys at Naughty Dog, and while the consequences of making such a successful game would come back to haunt them during the development of Uncharted 4: A Thief’s End, they – and their game, had secured a place in video game history.

2014 - Alien: Isolation

In a year with juggernauts like Dragon Age: Inquisition – which subsequently went on to win Game of the Year at The Game Awards, the one game that got most of my attention was a game nobody expected to succeed.

Creative Assembly, the studio known for developing the brilliant Total War games, took on a project with Sega to develop a visceral horror game based on the Alien franchise. From hiring the original actors to voice easter eggs to accurately recreating director Ridley Scott’s retro-futuristic technology in the 1979 classic, the studio went all out. The crowning jewel, however, was the AI that powered Xenomorphs in game.

Gone were the set jump scare points, and easily avoidable alien encounters. The AI was designed to react to your every move. If you crouched a lot, the alien would crawl on the floor to find out. If you hid in vents and closets, that’s where it would check first. The raw terror of hiding from an impossible killing machine that keeps outwitting you when you least expect it gave us one of the most organically terrifying games of the decade. There still isn’t anything like it yet.

2015 - The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt

For Polish developers CD Projekt Red, it was a dream come true. The company that started in the shaky economy of a former Soviet Union territory was, in 2014, at the cusp of something truly mind blowing. And they knew it.

CDPR has always been one for big risks. From managing to sell official copies of video games by offering appealing merch within the box in a country where everyone pirated digital media, to taking a strong anti-DRM stance, they walked the talk and stayed honest with the community. So when the company decided to go multi-platform with Witcher 3, after a book accurate Witcher 1 only on PC, and the unpolished gem that was Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings on PC and Xbox 360, they had to go all out.

A marketing blitz in 2014 that showcased the impressive world of The Witcher 3 was more than enough for anticipating fans to forgive delays in release. And when it did come out in May 2015, this magnum opus would go on to become one of the most successful video games of all time.

2016 - Doom

After 2004’s questionable Doom 3, the franchise was considered to be dead weight. Dedicated fans of the original Doom games kept the community alive with mods like Brutal Doom. However, there was interest in the community, and ID Software got to work.

Blending old-schooling shooting with new age controls, and adding shiny graphics and a soundtrack that makes one want to rip & tear their clothes apart and go to war, Doom 2016 was the best reboot one could hope for. The game was a pure, unadulterated power trip throughout the duration of your journey through hell. As the overused meme says, ‘In other games, you fight the boss. In Doom, you are the boss.’

2017 - The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild

It is hard to explain just how good Breath of the Wild is. Between the 900 Korok seeds, 120 shrines, four divine beasts, and a massive open world to explore, Nintendo’s rehashing of the old adventure game formula gives us a fresh new take on this storied franchise.

At its core, the latest entry to the franchise remains an adventure game. Players are rewarded for coming up with weird and interesting solutions to conflicts that present themselves within the game world. The limited, yet highly flexible array of tools available to Link asks you a simple question: Why attack head on, when you can annoy your enemies to death?

2018 - God of War

I remember the crowd reaction at E3 2016. The entire theatre erupted in cheers, and thousands of miles away, all my woes of sleep deprivation vanished the moment Kratos stepped out from the shadows of his cabin.

This was, perhaps, the most difficult year to choose a single game that represents it. Red Dead Redemption 2 blew our socks off with a compelling story, great performances, and an open world that I still roam around in for the peace and quiet. And yet, God of War overshadows it. A more mature Kratos, after murdering his entire extended family, learns to be a father once again in this epic tale of a father and son’s journey. If The Last of Us laid the groundwork, God of War is on the first floor.

Kratos, in a way, matured with the Game Director Cory Barlog. He knew that Kratos could not be the angry Spartan he used to be. In turning Kratos from a one-dimensional rage monster to a tragic figure befitting of a Greek tragedy, while also somehow retaining the combat roots of the older games, Barlog is the latest to push the boundaries of storytelling in video games.

2019 - Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice

Look, I love Death Stranding. I think it is one of the most unique games ever made, but it still falls into the trap of being repetitive. While Japanese Game Developer Hideo Kojima knocked it out of the park, it still has to be enough of a game. Death Stranding is a game for the future, hopefully a benchmark that will guide other studios along the way. But the game of 2019 goes to another Japanese studio – one that defined this decade with Dark Souls.

Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice is easily one of the greatest games I’ve ever played. This, despite the fact that it forgoes the freedom and cheese-making ability of Dark Souls and Bloodborne. Once you overcome the fear of being hit, and realise that the key to this game is unrelenting aggression, you are set free. Bosses like Genichiro Ashina become less of a dominant force, and more of a worthy adversary taunting you to clash swords with him.

That, combined with the tactile feedback of pulling off a pitch-perfect parry, and doing it again in quick succession, is extremely gratifying. Once you master the parry, there’s no going back. When once you avoided combat with fear, you now seek it out of pure bloodlust. That’s just how good the gameplay is.

Conclusion: 2020 - The Road Ahead

As gaming continues to become one of the most profitable industries in the world, video game publishers find new ways to squeeze money out of gamers. It is the nature of a company, after all, to make as much money as possible. Despite blatant corporate greed, Indie games continue to showcase the power of this medium, while the titans of the industry push out a few gems every now and then.

With From Software’s Elden Ring, CD Projeckt Red’s Cyberpunk 2077, Sucker Punch Entertainment’s Ghost of Tushisma, and even more exciting games scheduled to release in 2020, the year ahead looks rich in interactive entertainment.

And with new consoles just around the corner, I am eagerly looking forward to year-long speculation of technical specifications, launch titles, and price points. Here’s to another decade of mind-bending, and genre-defying entertainment on your home consoles and PC.

Cheers, and a happy new year!

The Last Gift

I

Bombs were falling

The night you were born

Humanity was tearing itself apart

And yet there you were 

The last thing I would give this world 

It was worth it

II

I woke up that night in the cold

Nobody to keep my bed warm

A few days later I felt dizzy and puked 

So I went to the doctor 

And he told me I would be a mother 

This is news every woman longs to hear

But to me it wasn't very happy news 

III

This poem I'm writing is during one of those rare times 

When I don't have a syringe in my hand 

Or the contents of a bottle in my stomach

I am just smoking

It's a filthy habit, don't try it

I'm too far gone my child

But I want you to live

Grow, and like a tree 

Grow tall, grow well, grow strong 

Be a good human being 

Be what I couldn't be 

IV

The hospital again

They say I'm won't survive if I bring you into this world 

"Neither can live while the other survives", wasn't it?

And so I must go now

And you must live for both of us 

The hospital will arrange for your adoption

You will have a father and a mother 

Not a broken home and a shattered woman

V

With all my love

Santa

The Bilge Master

The Book Pledge

I hereby swear

That I shall read 

Till I drop dead 

I swear to go on adventures 

Hidden in pages 

I swear to slay dragons

I swear to protect my loved ones 

I swear I shall read 

For I have been infected 

With the reader's bug

And from this there is no escape

I swear I shall learn from fictional characters

Applying their wisdom in my life 

Be they in manga, comic books or novels 

I swear to fantasize

About scenarios in my head 

And think up alternate endings for the books I didn't like

With a book in my hand I can travel the world 

In the comfort of my room

Without learning to swim

I can cross the seven seas 

The Bilge Master

When?

Little games of chess

Each of us trying to checkmate the other

Using any tool available

Manipulation

Vote banks

Bribes

Just to stay in power

Nobody seems to care about us

The common people can go jump off a cliff 

The economy is in trouble

There are so many mouths to feed 

But no means to earn salaries 

Women are not safe

I just don't know where we are going 

I'm scared 

And confused 

What if the next person to come to power 

Does the same 

After making hollow promises 

To improve the state of this state

The country lies bleeding

When will her wounds be tended to?

When?

The Bilge Master

Vitriol

Vitriol, violent and volatile

Choking up your lungs as it burns

As pile after pile of paper burns

As Molotov after Molotov is hurled

As the people you pay to protect you

Turn around and shoot 

All this does is broaden a divide 

As an infant cries in his father's arms

What are we doing?

Where are we going?

Will this ever end?

All around you can hear screams 

As this country lies bleeding 

Does anyone care?

Or is it going to be another day at the office?

The blame games and shrugs

The refusal to take responsibility

As prices to be paid multiply

In whose bank account is the money credited?

Meanwhile, the lean get leaner 

The fat get fatter 

And the country we call Mother 

Suffers under our blows

The Bilge Master

Out of the Dark

Six years

And a few months here and there

To dispell the darkness that I had plunged myself into

Insecure and frightened 

A caged animal, lashing out at loved ones 

In pain

Happiness? What's that?

And yet

In spite of it all

I held on

As the walls closed in around me 

I fought 

For what else did you expect 

From a cornered animal?

Voices in the void 

Telling me I was useless 

People around me, busy with their lives 

While mine had stopped completely

Yes I gave up 

Yes I lost hope and faith

And yes every time that happened 

A hand came for me 

To pull me to my feet

To bandage the bloodstains in my soul

To glue back the broken pieces 

To make a warrior whole

I slipped into darkness again and again

And got up again and again

For I had family 

And friends 

Who didn't give up on me 

And stood behind me 

Aiding me in my battles 

Then someone trained me 

To battle my demons properly

I was given a restructured sword 

One whose slashes caused damage 

And with it in my grasp

I beat the darkness 

And bathed my soul with light

Purifying 

Exorcising

Today I stand before you, reborn

And I thank each and every person who stood with me

Even when I was the bad guy

And did horrible things to them 

Thank you for not giving up on me 

Thank you for saving me 

 And they say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger 

I can feel that strength coursing through my body

And with it, I swear to fight darkness

And let in light 

The Bilge Master

My Best Friend

It's not easy writing 

About girls 

There always seems a lot to say

A lot gets left out

This is a poem about a very precious girl

Whose smile colours a monochrome photo

And in whose eyes I never want to see tears

I met her one day 

When I least expected to

We went for a drink

And downed two

She knows all my secrets

And tells me hers 

I'm the one who consoles her 

After her fights

She's grown up without a dad

Her mom is exceptional

And if you look into her eyes 

You'll see what a good person she is

She's very stubborn and often drives me mad 

Sometimes she crosses all possible lines 

But when it comes to the people she wants to protect

She leaves no stone unturned

I've nicknamed her Boson

And I love her to the moon and back

And somewhere in a private place 

As she packs a bag for outer space 

I will be by her side 

Till the day she dies 

Even if I become a demon

In this regard 

Selfish and protective of her

I'm willing to cut all ties 

Does this sound like a man in love to you?

If so you need to grow up

I'd fight for her, lie for her 

Walk the wire for her 

And yes, perhaps even die for her 

That, dear reader is what she means to me

And I can't imagine my life without her in it

The Bilge Master

Untitled Ramblings

It's December

And for want of warmth

I'm wearing a full sleeve shirt

Waiting for a train on the platform

That's late by two minutes

It's late, and the sun has gone down

Beside me is a child eating chocolate

And somewhere out there is a girl

Who's missing me

Or so I hope

Someday I'll return to her, I promised her

Over chicken hot and sour soup

I wish I had smiled while saying goodbye

The train is here, serpentine, with two glowing eyes

That allow it to see, albeit artificially

I wonder when I'll be on a train home 

And not getting down at the end of the line

My name means infinite 

I was chistened thus because of my mother's love of Tagore

The future is like my name

Infinite 

And full of wonder 

And so I leave this poem here 

As a testament to what I don't know

The Bilge Master

A Memory-Guest Post by Kiki Ayang

My friend Kiki Ayabg returns to the blog with a poem! It's been four years Kiki. Let's do this more often :)

The Bilge Master

Long, long time ago

A peculiar shadow caught my eye.

I stared to see an aged old man-

A wise looking old man was he!

I wondered if I was hallucinating

He looked so calm and gentle

Yet fierce and weary

As if, weary not with life,

Nevertheless, with the youngsters around.

Long, long time ago

While I sat down one fine day,

Watching figures pass by in school,

I stared down a shadow-

Only to look up and see a jolly young fellow.

He portrayed happiness, the kind with no care

So jolly and happy he looked around his friends

Which didn’t take me by surprise!

Long, long time later

I saw myself staring down a shadow,

Little did I knew

T’was Wisdom that I saw! 

My Dear Daughter

My dear daughter

I apologize

For I will fail you

As you grow up into a woman

Perhaps I will fail you before

This world we live in

Does not deserve you

I can't let you wear jeans

I can't let you wear saris

I will never breathe easy when you are out

And it's dark

I will fail you

I cannot give you freedom

For it is denied to you

By the opposite gender 

Who see you as a consumable product 

Not a human being 

I will fail you

By bringing you into this world 

By teaching you to live a good life 

One without shackles or stigma

I will dread the day you learn to read 

And get an education

For then you will realize why I have failed you

It's because of men

Men who treat others like objects of lust

Men who believe themselves to be crusaders 

Men who judge women for wearing skirts or tops

Never mind your age 

Your gender is a signed death sentence 

How can I let you come into this world

When this world clearly isn't made for you?

Or for the thousands and millions of daughters out there 

Scared to go out of their homes?

When the news channels show each day

That someone has had their honor looted 

Then been murdered or tortured 

When the judicial system turns savages into celebrities

Tell me, what face will I show before you?

It is better, dear daughter that you not exist

For this world is not meant for you

You deserve so much more 

Written in memory of Priyanka Reddy

Two Poems from a While Ago-A Guest Post by Laura Cook

Laura Cook returns to From Life to Me with two poems she wrote a while ago. That was the subject line of the email she sent me and I felt it would work very well as the title to this post.

Welcome back, Laura!

The Bilge Master

KALOPSIA

- after Sára J. Molčan’s “Post Coital”

When my mother smoked cigarettes,

she exhaled in flowers: dainty periwinkle, 

sprigs of foxglove, a wall of top-heavy tulips.

The blooms scrambled upwards from her lips,

reaching for the light above the kitchen table

as if it were a sun instead of a fluorescent flicker.

As an infant, I would enfold the petals in my 

chubby palms, not questioning this miracle

of horticulture. But when I was older I noticed

how she would always smoke after my father had 

stormed off into the night, leaving the house

as shocked and silent as the air after a slap.

A trellis of roses climbed in front of her face, 

a screen. It was her way of not seeing.

She did the same when he raised his fists

to me, and on the day I finally raised mine

back to him. I don’t know if my father saw the flowers;

I don’t know if he was even capable of knowing beauty

when he encountered it. All I know is that

when I think of spring, I feel a burning in my lungs and

a cough in my throat, and a familiar anger rises in my chest. 

Every year I leave a pack of Salems on her headstone, 

hoping that I will return to find a bouquet. 

SUMMER STORMS

- after Hobson Pittman’s “Reflections”

My mother used to call us to the porch 

to watch the summer thunderstorms. 

We’d sit just out of reach of the driving rain, 

close enough to catch drops in our palms

and shriek in glee at the crashes of thunder. 

Once, lightning struck the red maple out front 

with a flash so blinding I saw it in my dreams 

for weeks. When the angry gray clouds moved out 

towards the mountains, they left us a world

so bright and clear it hurt to look at. We splashed 

through the grass, danced our feet verdant green. 

My mother would pick up the fallen branches and 

weave herself a crown. Wildness burned in her eyes 

after a storm, a feral thrill that took hours to fade.

When I returned from the funeral, a storm louder than 

any I could remember descended upon the old house.

The floorboards shook. A vase of ancient silk flowers

tipped from a shelf, crash muffled by the rain’s dull roar.

The beat of my heart pounded in my ears, 

a primeval song without words, a battle drum.

For a moment I thought I saw my mother 

through the rain, long-legged and twirling.

I knew without looking that her feet were as green

as moss, that on her brow rested a circlet of branches.

Look, girls, she called. Come and see the storm!

Song Interpretation: Famous Last Words by My Chemical Romance

My Chemical Romance is a band that is known for some sublime music. Take Welcome to the Black Parade as an example. They have soany good songs-Helena, I'm Not Okay (I Promise), Disenchanted, Teenagers...the list goes on. But for me personally Famous Last Words is a song that doesn't get the credit it deserves.

Famous Last Words is one of the tracks off the album The Black Parade which is by far one of the best albums MCR has produced. It is a song that told me a story when I heard it. Let me convey that story to you tonight. 

I think the song is about an old man or a man who is world weary. He is however wise and quite intelligent. He just doesn't know what to do with his wisdom. Should he utilize it to make the lives of others better? Should he be selfish and guard it like a secret? 

The song's chorus is 

"I am not afraid to keep on living 

I am not afraid to walk this world alone"

He doesn't really fear being alone as is clear from the first two lines. But then this happens 

"Honey if you stay, I'll be forgiven

Nothing you can say can stop me going home"

Here is where the beauty of the song struck me. He gets a chance at salvation. A normal life with a meaningful someone-perhaps a family. What does he choose? Does he accept the offer or does he scorn it and go on living the way he has? Is it possible that he knows no other way to live and is therefore scared of human attachment?

I keep finding myself asking one question- is this man sane? I feel he is. I think his wisdom keeps him sane. I don't think the man is young. I think he has fought quite a few battles (metaphorical or literal) to be exactly where he is when the song starts. I don't think he wants to go back. 

So where is he? Is he in yet another hotel room, looking into a mirror at a face that he no longer recognizes? Is he running from his demons? Has he accepted his flaws? Is he ready to move ahead?

Unfortunately, I do not know the answers to these questions. I leave them open to interpretation because I would like to know what you guys make of the song. 

At the end of the song I found myself wondering about the choices people make in life. As Robert Frost said in his poem, he was faced with the choice of taking one road of two that diverged in front of him in a yellow wood. While this choice defined the rest of his life.

The message is the same in Famous Last Words. A man makes a choice. He lived with that choice. For him that choice defined his entire life. He looks back on it as Mr. Way and sings us a song about it.

The Bilge Master

Artificial

Wake up, log on

Stay online all day

All your moments uploaded 

Either manually or automatically

As hashtags take over common sentences 

While grammar whirls in it's grave 

Each day a new photo or video to share 

Each day a status or link to upload 

Say goodbye to meeting friends

Because Watch Parties are the new BFF

So add a new post on Instagram

Update it on Twitter 

Share on Facebook

Send edited photos on Snapchat

And repeat after me 

I. Am. Free

The Bilge Master

Breaking Away

You woke up today

And the bed was cold 

Because I was gone 

You were brushing your teeth when you saw the note 

That said I won't be back

I wonder if you're missing me now 

I wonder if you still have that bottle of Chanel No 5

Before I used to come up gasping for air 

Because of your razor blade caress of love 

Now I find I am at peace 

Which has come without you in my life 

I suppose I have no choice but to be okay with that

Because you have lived and I haven't 

I have dreams 

I want to see the world I am a part of 

I want to be free 

I want to run, stop hiding behind a fake face 

Just as a coocoon evolves into a butterfly 

I want to evolve too

Come out of my shell 

And just live happily

I just wish you'd understood me when you had the chance 

Maybe then I wouldn't be living away from you

But you made your choice and now we must both live with it 

Each dealing with it in our own style 

I wish you well and will always be your son

One day forgive me for what I've done 

The Bilge Master

Distortion

How does it feel to live a life that's distorted?

It's like everything is just smoke and mirrors

It can make you a tad nihilistic

Or is that just because of the chemicals?

Never mind the system of delivery

Liquid or vapor 

You feel like a prostitute

Each day someone new to please 

You forget that at 25 

The only person you need to please 

Is you

And so you reason with yourself 

And try to find a way out of this mess 

You miss your lover's caress 

The warmth of their mouth on yours

You miss home and all the smells you associated with it

A new hallucination gives you indigestion

As you let yet another nightmare come to life 

But this is not who you are 

Find yourself and fight 

For a nightmare is nothing but a bad dream

And sooner or later you wake up

Even from the harshest of dreams 

The Bilge Master

The Wind

The wind that blows outside my window

Swirls round and round

Taking the leaves for a ride

And making trees bend under it's might

When it's late at night

And all the lights are out 

The wind howls 

Like a banshee outside 

Making my windowpanes rattle

Making me want to cover myself with a quilt 

To take away my fear

The wind is cunning

It knows how to frighten people

More potently than Frankenstein's monster 

The wind is blowing steadily and surely

But it is not a sailor's friend 

It is a tempest

Mighty and to be reckoned with

The wind is coming for you next

Run

The Bilge Master

Infinity Part 2

All my life I spent a slave to time

When all I wanted was to run

Run like the wind

Wake up at sunrise 

Wash your face 

Don't bother changing out of the clothes you wore 

Since yesterday

Tie up those mouldy sneakers 

Your ex got for you before she left

Lock the door with it's faded paint 

Throw away the rusty old key too

And run with me into infinity

Wouldn't it be lovely?

The Bilge Master

Infinity

All my life I have been measuring things 

Sometimes time, sometimes distance

Other times I measured speed

And tried to maintain diaries 

That measured my thoughts

Until one day my measuring tape tore 

And I was free from being shackled 

I discovered a different me 

A me that wanted to run

Like a wild stallion 

So I dusted my shoes 

And laced them up

Despite lying unused for years 

They still fit me 

Hesitatingly I took a few steps 

Then a few more 

And suddenly my fear was gone 

Nowadays I don't measure anymore 

I run

Join me 

Run with me into infinity

Wouldn't it be lovely?

The Bilge Master

What If

Open the book

Turn a few pages 

Look through the eyes of someone else

Be a part of their world, their life

Isn't that why we read?

Microcosms and macrocosms

Coming to life through pages 

Stained with ink

But what if one day

This all ended?

What if one day

The sky fell on our heads 

Like in the Asterix comics

What if one day, literacy died 

And took with it all the literature it could find?

What would we do on the day

Every writer became devoid of ideas

And what if that day were tomorrow?

Where would we go?

Who would give us food for thought?

Where would the fairy tales be

That our mothers used to send us to sleep?

What if one day

There were no more novels 

Or bestsellers 

What if one day

All the bookstores burnt down?

The Bible says Armageddon happens when the Four ride 

I say it'll happen the day books die

The Bilge Master 

The Comfort of Being Sad

Legendary rock band Nirvana has a lyric which goes "I miss the comfort of being sad". Think about this for a minute. 

Humans love comfort zones and creature comforts a lot. It's because we like them that we don't dare to step out of our designated areas and try something new. On one hand we think our life is going well- well paying job, beautiful wife, two kids etcetera. However is the job really about the money? Is the wife's beauty really all that great? After all, these things are superficial aren't they? 

One of my friends who works in a law firm and shall remain anonymous once told me he was on medication for stress and anxiety directly caused by his work. He earns well. Another friend stayed on in a toxic relationship for a long time, even when it turned abusive. 

Mental illness is also a comfort zone and hence the Nirvana lyrics at the start of the post. We feel secure in our shroud of affliction. This is especially true for depression. Just as I typed depression my keyboard prompted a crying emoji. Yes we want to cry and somehow wrest ourselves out of depression but somehow it smothers us. This is what is so dangerous about mental illnes. Add to that the stigma that society will calmly and calculatingly place on your head if they ever found out you had or have a mental illness. It's like a modern form of leprosy. So people who suffer from it often don't seek help because they feel they're "okay".

Why do you judge your neighbor because he takes Lamortrigine? Why can't you treat it like a normal disease- a stomach upset for example and let things lie? As Bob Dylan sang: "The old road's rapidly aging, please get out of the new one if you can't lend a hand." This rings true on so many levels. 

Change is the only constant. John Mayer has written a beautiful song on change called Waiting on the World to Change. He's followed up with another, simply titled Changing in 2017. The lyrics to both these songs are stellar. Give them a listen.

I firmly believe that it's time for people who stigmatize mental illness to grow up. Accept. Don't segregate. We have had enough Apartheid. Be kind. Love. Don't be the reason someone takes their life.

Life is precious. Live and let live and above all else be good human beings. Help out if you know someone with an ailment be it physical or mental. Human beings are capable of so much. Is asking for some compassion too much?

The Bilge Master 

It Rained in November

He was a boy with a guitar

She was a girl with a voice 

They met up in a bar 

When it was nearly closing time

He chose a stiff whiskey

She picked out a wine 

And outside the window

There was no sunshine 

It was a cold November night 

The rain reminded them

Of the GnR song

And they talked and they talked 

While outside it poured 

Then the boy tuned his guitar

And she cleared her throat

And they struck up Tiny Dancer 

In that bar by the coast

Then it was time to go home 

So they bid each other goodnight 

What a way to end the day

They thought 

As time slipped away

They've both grown up now

She works at a lab

He's into engineering

And this poem is something a writer promised them

Based entirely off a few Facebook conversations 

So raise your glasses to Aphrodite and Debdip

Two of the whitest people I know 

And wish them success with their journey

As they go with the flow

The Bilge Master 

The Life of a Poet

Oh! The life a poet leads

Lost inside walls of words 

Spewing from his mind 

He can write verses that dazzle 

Turn a rainy night into a sunny morning 

He can make you look through the kaleidoscope of his eyes 

At the different colors that make up his mind 

With ink as his water and paper as his food

Our poet has vowed to supply us with nourishing 

He is the proudest of parents though his children aren't human

But what appeals to one may cause another to turn away in disgust

So who is our poet to listen to?

His heart which is full of passion?

Or his brain which advises caution?

The Bilge Master

On Whisper of the Heart -A Studio Ghibli Movie

Have you ever wanted to do something different from others around you? Have you hidden that part of you from your peers and tried to conform? If the answer to both these questions is yes, then you should watch Whisper of the Heart.

Studio Ghibli needs no introduction among people for it is one of the biggest studios in Japan, and has brought out 22 movies till date. Whisper of the Heart is one of them. In it we follow the tale of two children- Shizuku and Seiji.

Shizuku is a talented writer, and an avid reader while Seiji wants to be a violin maker. They both study in the same school and are both equally confused about their futures. It's one thing to have a hobby and quite another to have a passion and Whisper of the Heart brings this out beautifully.

As the movie progresses, Shizuku meets Seiji's grandfather who has a statue of a cat called The Baron. She decides to write a story about the statue. Her story takes her two months to write and in the meantime Seiji goes to Italy, where he is apprentices to a violin maker. Two months later, they both meet again and realize they have some more learning to do before they can do what they seem of doing. On this very mature note, the movie concludes.

Why did this movie appeal to me? To know the answer, let me take you back to my school days. I was in tenth grade when we were asked to assemble a basic Ohm's law circuit. I short circuited the resistor by mistake and blew the lab fuse. Suddenly all the lights went out and so did the fans. Not a single electrical connection was live. It turns out that I had placed one wire in the wrong position. One wire is all it took to cripple an entire lab. Once you see that kind of power, how can you look away?

And so I decided to become an engineer and in 2017 I became one. I am currently working in an electrical firm where I handle sales. I had the support from my teachers and parents and the guts to follow my dream despite depression. It's going to be a while before I am a good engineer but the seed has started to germinate.

And so to all of you out there who are hesitant to follow your dreams and do what your heart tells you, watch Whisper of the Heart. Don't be afraid of being different. Embrace your inner self. Make that dream come true. Dare to disturb the universe.

The Bilge Master 

The Library of Found Souls

I

We all know that death comes for us all
One day we all get a ticket
To the great gig in the sky
But what we don't know is
What happens to our souls when we die
Where do they go?
Some say Heaven, others claim Hell
And still other exclaim Purgatory
I say they become books and go to a library

II

Think for a moment
What if there was a library
Inside which the books were stories about souls
Souls of people who had left their bodies
Somewhere in the sands of time?

III

You could rent a book out
That was the soul of a family member
You never knew
Or read about other souls and walk a mile in their shoes
Oh! What perspective it would give to you

IV

But what entity would be the librarian?
She would perhaps be someone kind but strict
"No tearing or manhandling!", she would say
While handing you the chosen book
"You are expected to return it in two weeks"
And off you'd go with another book to read

V

And now where is this library to be?
Is it imaginary?
Perhaps
Or perhaps it's disguised as a laundromat
We need books because they cry out to be read
We need libraries to forget regret
And I firmly believe
That in each book
Is a fragment of someone's soul
And reading is the conduit through which we get to know them well
The library is made of tales you hear and your absorption of them
It's open to all, 24 hours a day
It's waiting with arms open
Come inside, won't you?

The Bilge Master

Melancholia, Sweet Melancholia

Melancholia, sweet melancholia
You've been with me for a while
And in my mind's eye, you used to be beautiful
Two years you held me captive in a house
While physicians with their allopathy
Tried to separate us
But you were irresistible my melancholia
I was lost in your kiss
The cold caress of your lips on mine
And your dark nails of faith
Had me crucified, wanting to die, to escape
Three more years have passed
My melancholia, how we've grown
Me a plump lump
You, raven haired, sleeping in the Devil's bed
Melancholia, it's time for the symbiosis to end
I have sinned for you and alienated in your name
It's time for me to repent
And so melancholia, this is my last missive to you
Melancholia, my love, I have to break free
You've become a voice in my head
That I no longer want to listen to
I have learned how to smile
I will not weep for you anymore
When the music stops, so will our dance
Farewell melancholia
I'll miss my train if I keep talking to you

The Bilge Master

On Music Once Again

Music has power, let that be the premise
As I go on to surmise on the many qualities music possesses
It has the power to take away sorrow
And leave you looking forward to tomorrow
It is a blend of attraction and expression
Depending on what instrument you choose
Music is a living thing
Made out of frequencies not arteries
It removes barriers and inspires
But demands a lot of perspiration from it's maker
Music can cool a hot head
It can soothe the most grievous of wounds
And is a substance that does not harm you
If taken in large quantities
Hush now, night has fallen
And as we all know, the night is a time for listening
So close your eyes and plug in your earphones
And let a stranger who has become your friend
Serenade you to sleep
Slowly, gently and surely

The Bilge Master

Lights

There was once a soldier
Returning from war
His eyes had seen much
Entire empires rise and fall
He was old, and he was tired
Making his way home
Through a cold night
Suddenly in front of him
There arose a shaft of light
And the soldier heard His voice
Blessings were showered on him
And the light showed him the way home
On this festival of light
Remember our soldiers
Who stand watch so we can sleep
Do not forget them
Because you can be sure
That they haven't forgotten you

The Bilge Master

Banes

When I was nine years old, an impressionable age; I was gifted The Lord of the Rings:The Fellowship of the Ring by my father. I devoured it. I loved everything about it. Bilbo's walking song, Frodo's coming of age, Gollum, the trek to Rivendell and of course the forming of the Fellowship.

But the one scene that got branded in my mind was Gandalf's fight with the Balrog (Durin's Bane) in the mines of Moria. It was the first time that the reader is shown Gandalf's true power (before he ascends to Gandalf the White). To avoid spoilers I'll just say he survived the fight.

Forgive me for rambling on like this but I firmly believe that there is a lesson to be learnt here. Like Durin, we all have our banes-anxiety, anger, insecurity-some are strong and hard to fight; but we should not give up. That means the bastard's won.

Problems are milestones that tell us we are doing the job of living correctly. They say that what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. We should aspire to be strong. We should look forward to challenges and to being challenged. It's the only way to ascend from gray to white.

The most important thing we must do is forget the past and distance ourselves from those who live in the past. This is vital. Without this we cannot appreciate the Now and if we don't appreciate the Now we aren't living- we are dying.

Holding grudges, giving in to angst or other phenomena will lead to the implosion of a nuke in us bigger than Hiroshima or Nagasaki. We all have our inner Gandalfs. We have tremendous mental capacity and survival instincts. We fall, but we also rise.

So come. Take my hand and my blade

Arise

The Bilge Master

J And H

Doctor Jekyll and Mr. Hyde
Were two sides of the same coin
On one side the genius
On the other madness
There is a Hyde hiding in all of us
It's what makes us flawed
Creatures of gray, not black nor white
Unlike in Dickens
We exist together
With all our might
I say do not let your Hyde hide
Face the darkness and only then
Can you guide yourself into the light
So pick up the sword you've dropped
Let it glitter like a beacon
And cross swords with your inner Hyde
But remember not to eliminate him
For without him you won't be able
To differentiate sorrow from happiness

The Bilge Master 

My Kind of Crazy

To be my kind of crazy
You don't have to do much
Just be a zealot
Without a church
Or perhaps a cook
Without a recipe
My kind of crazy
Is a groovy hippie
With his own weed garden
And a psychedelic convertible
If you meet my kind of crazy
Stop and say hello
And in response
Be reminded of a song
My kind of crazy
Walks the streets at 3AM
Looking for love
They compose till dawn
And publish at midday
They are also professionals
At talking to themselves
You don't need no Chemical X
To be my kind of crazy
But it might help if you
Have a romance or two
My kind of crazy is warm and fluffy
And lives in a house with 15 cats and 12 different birds
Now tell me reader
Are you my kind of crazy too?

The Bilge Master

How Bleach Helped Me Survive a Mental Hospital

Bleach is an anime series about Japanese Death Gods (called Shinigami) and about a human who is given the powers of a Shinigami. It features many arcs and sends the message that the human spirit is capable of enduring and overcoming the toughest of situations. The protagonist, a 15 year old called Kurosaki Ichigo is someone who can see the spirits of dead people and has tremendous spiritual pressure or reiatsu as it is termed in the anime. The viewer follows Ichigo as he first becomes a substitute Shinigami, then goes on to rescue his friends, fighting many battles in the process, before finally taking on the villain of the series- Aizen.

From the word go, I was struck by Ichigo's spunk. In spite of knowing he was fighting beings far stronger than he was, he never gave up. He had decent swordplay skills and he developed a bond with his sword (Zangetsu in Shikai and Tensa Zangetsu in Bankai); and this helped him grow in power.

Plato said that "The measure of a man is what he does with power". Ichigo, though being extremely powerful, only used that power to protect his friends. This protective instinct is what drove him to even risk death. One example of this is when he tells Aizen he doesn't want to fight in city limits and takes the battle to a remote area.

I was admitted into a mental institution on 15th May 2019, and I am writing this sitting in my room there. It is about 5:30pm but the light is sufficient to write with. It is the 10th of September and in five days I will complete 4 months here. Some of you are aware of my ongoing battle with bipolar disorder and I have come here to kill it dead.

The days pass slowly, leaving me with enough time to introspect. Being inducted into the Daycare unit however gives me a weapon to murder time with. It's a mix of counselling and activities, reminding mr of Ichigo's training under Urahara and later Youroichi.

I have made progress with managing anger and have come to realise that compared to the other patients here, I am not really sick. I have also realised that my anger triggers my depressive phase and if I don't get angry, I won't fall sick.

I keep thinking-"What would Ichigo do?" Though fictional, his struggle is every bit as real as the situations I have faced in my life. I draw inspiration from Ichigo's deeds and his never say die attitude. Be it Kenpachi Zaraki, Renji Abarai or Aizen, Ichigo has gone up against them all with a smile on his face. Ichigo has kept me sane in this hospital and his attitude has been nothing short of phenomenally inspiring to me.

I thank the creators of Bleach and my friend Udayan for introducing me to this anime. I urge my readers to give it a look and maybe one of you will find inspiration from Ichigo as well!

The Bilge Master

Grace

Patience is a virtue
Virtue is a grace
Grace is a little girl
Who doesn't wash her face
It's been five years since her mom cleaned the place
Her father is a drunkard, a degenerate and a disgrace
Years they fly on by
Grace is a survivor
25 years of age
Third baby on the way
I knew her as a little girl
But then so much changed
Where did her smile go?
What happened to her face?
I wish I knew
I wish I knew
And what hurts more
Is that there is nothing I can do
There is no saving Grace

The Bilge Master

Cigarette Memories

Hello my love

I'm in a bar

And the stale cigarette smoke

Reminds me of those Turkish cigarettes

We used to smoke

The first time we held hands

With the smoke in our lungs

It reminds me of the first time we made love

Magic was in the air that night

But that magic is not here

Where I am now

I ship out tomorrow

To fight a white man's war

I might not make it back

If I don't, take care of mother

Though I cannot remember the last time we spoke

Another lungful of smoke and I want you even more

My love, if I go

Keep me in your memory

Don't shed too many tears

And if I make it back

From this meaningless bloodshed

Let us do all that we planned to do

When we were dating in college

Let's go on those trips

And take photos of us

Teach me how to bake

You do it so well

The bar is closed now

The hour almost at hand

I am outside in the chilly winter

And my love

There is no more cigarette smoke

The Bilge Master

Nyctophile

I sleep when the rooster crows

And the sun comes up

When evening falls, I awaken

And eat some food

Some for the belly, some for thought

The night

Ah, the night!

There is no one to see me

As the city is asleep

That is when I feel alive

I set to work, creating

With my mighty pen I make worlds

With my loyal brush I paint imagination

On a cloth canvas

And just when the night is darkest

I retire to bed

As a new day dawns

And the city awakens

I am someone who has fallen

Through a crack

I find myself an alien

Amongst my own kind

They judge me

Vilify

Because I am not like them

I am the fool on the hill

And by being a fool

To the outside

Nobody knows who I am inside

I'm okay with that

For my individuality is my armor

Nobody can take it from me

So I make love to the night

And she loves me back too

Dare I ask for more?

The Bilge Master

Under the Red Jacket- A Guest Post by Udayan Das

Udayan Das is back on the blog with a character sketch of Dante from the Devil May Cry series. He touches on the games as well as the manga and anime in this article. Devil May Cry is a series very close to my heart and it is something both Udayan and I are very passionate about. I hope you will enjoy this writeup as much as Udayan enjoyed writing it for you to read.

The Bilge Master

Under the Red Jacket

Game. Literally, an activity engaged in for pleasure or fun. Specifically, one that involves some kind of challenge, which is either successfully overcome, or not, determining victory or defeat. In today’s world, video games are as valid a form of gaming activity as any other. With their immense popularity and the growing reach of technology, more and more people are entering the seemingly endless waters of video game world. 

Video games however, do not begin and end simply as “sporting” activities. The appeal of a game is not truly limited to the having a goal, and overcoming obstacles to achieve it within a given set of rules. In other words, it isn’t all about gameplay. Video games stand apart from other forms of playing in their unusual ability to do one other thing.

Telling stories.

With the improvement in computer hardware, specifically processing and graphical power, games are capable of visually depicting so much, often with incredible degrees of realism. They are also much larger than they were in the past, large enough to contain an entire, self-sufficient story, from premise, to journey, to denouement.

Of course, in the end, gameplay still forms the core of what makes a “game”. Hardcore players will often refuse to play a title unless it provides adequate difficulty, and some will only play specific multiplayer titles because the thrill for them lies in besting another human being.

In this exclusivist, meritocratic community of skill-based players, some games are held in higher regards than others. Tekken, Street Fighter and Counter Strike come to mind. Arenas where the best of the best pit their wits, reflexes, dexterity and frame knowledge of their chosen sport against their peers. But of course, multiplayer games aren’t the only ones held in high regard.

Certain single player games, by virtue of their combat systems, challenge, mechanical depth, and overall sheer fun factor, are considered legendary. And nowhere is this more true than the hack ‘n’ slash genre. Combining massive hordes of aggressive enemies that do insane amounts of damage, with a strong lead character that’s as powerful physically as they are charismatic, a good hack ‘n’ slash game is the ultimate combination of power fantasy and actual challenge.

Needless to say, when one is playing as a certain Umbra Witch or super-powered Ninja, one is far more concerned about pulling off sick combos than such trivial concerns as “lore” and “plot”.

Right?

Well, I wonder.

Today, I’m here to analyse a game series that’s been praised since its inception for the brilliance of its combat system. For the intensity, pace and fluidity of its action and fights. For its cool lead character and uniquely monstrous bosses.

I’m talking about the undisputed king of the hack ‘n’ slash genre. It’s name?

Devil May Cry.

But I’m not going to talk about how deep its combo system is. How nearly all moves can be seamlessly transitioned from one to the other. How they can be cancelled in air to relentlessly attack in a symphony of button presses that will push the limits of your dexterity. How it rewards creativity in combat, and wants you to not only defeat your enemies, but look badass while doing it. I’m not going to talk about the brilliant AI and arena design. I’m not even going to talk about how downright beautiful Devil May Cry 5 looks (seriously, it puts most Hollywood movies to shame with those graphics).

No, I’m not going to talk about the gameplay or graphics at all.

I’m going to talk about what is simultaneously DMC’s most celebrated, and under-appreciated aspect. The single biggest factor behind its success, and arguably one of the greatest achievements of the video game medium as a whole.

Dante.

Under-appreciated? Dante is one of the most recognizable characters in the history of video games. With his trademark red jacket, two-handed sword, twin handguns and silver hair, he boasts a look that’s instantly stylish and memorable. Combined with his skills and attitude, he is the definition of what the playable protagonist of a character action game should be.

How then, can such an influential character, who is so often imitated but never replicated, be under-appreciated?

Well, the reason is that his design is actually too strong, to the point where most of the attention is focused on his external aspects, and not enough to what lies inside.

Everyone knows what Dante is.

Almost no one knows who Dante is.

So who is he, really?

Dante is one of the twin sons born to a demon father, Sparda, and a human mother, Eva. Sparda was an extraordinarily powerful being who single-handedly fought the armies of the underworld and defeated their ruler Mundus, thus protecting the human world. Closing the portal between demon and human worlds came at a price. Most of Sparda’s own power was sealed off as well. A weakened Sparda then settled down in our plane of existence, and later fell in love with a woman named Eva.

The two lived together for a while, raising their sons.

This is where DMC’s brilliantly subtle writing hides its power.

Almost nothing is said about this short period of time. Eight years to be precise. 

What were those eight years like? What sort of a father was Sparda? Strict? Doting? Was he able to relate to his mortal children? What was Dante’s relationship like with him? Did Sparda ever personally train his sons? How did Eva handle being the link between three uniquely difficult people? What was it like for her to love a demon? Did she face discrimination and whispers? Was she treated as a heretic? What was it like for Dante, being the son of that demon? Did he have any human friends at all? Did he go to school?

We don’t know, and we likely never will.

Dante’s future is cruelly blighted when Sparda leaves the home.

This act wasn’t committed out of callousness: Sparda knew that the Demon Prince’s followers were still after him. So he left, intending to draw them away from his family, in order to keep them safe. Did Sparda survive? Is he alive now? Again, we do not know. At the very least, Dante has not seen him since, and it is always implied that he is dead.

This was the loss of a father figure in Dante’s life, a loss that would have a deep impact on anyone. But more on that later.

Shortly after Sparda leaves, the home is attacked by demons. Without him, there is no one to fight them off. Eva hides Dante in a closet to protect him, telling him to stay there. She also tells him that if she doesn’t return, he must run. Go far away, somewhere else, and start a new life, as someone else, with a new name. She then goes to look for her other son, Vergil, whose whereabouts are unknown at the moment.

Eva does not return. She is killed by demons. Vergil is still nowhere to be found.

Dante is now without a family.

This is the precise moment when the worth of those eight years, which are never described in the series, is made clear.

Those eight years constitute the only period in Dante’s life where he was truly, completely happy. In the times to come, this untainted memory remains pristine in Dante’s mind, heart and soul, the only places where he can keep it safe.

Realizing this simple fact reveals a depth to Dante’s character that is unnoticeable at first. Suddenly, the light-hearted attitude, all the constant quips and banter are revealed as a front. Dante’s devil-may-care way of life is a result of the fact that on a personal level, he simply is not considered about his own safety. Without a family, he has no one to live for. The only thing that keeps him going is a lifelong grudge against the demons that took them away from him.

In the anime, Dante is stoic and passive in his office, often subdued in his solitude. In contrast, he is active and lively in the games, since the vast part of the latter has him in actual combat situations. Dante comes alive when he is fighting demons because it is the only time he feels alive. All his rage is condensed into vengeance, manifesting in a brutal fighting style that is as effective as it is reckless and beautiful.

Coming back to the sequence of events, however, a young, homeless Dante must now travel, trying to run and hide from the demons who are still after him. All while seeking revenge.

It is worthwhile to note that Dante’s superhuman strength, speed, healing factor, reflexes, senses and supernatural powers are the result of Sparda’s blood flowing through him. The manga implies that these abilities took time to manifest properly, and revealed themselves as he matured. They also manifest in response to immediate need. In the manga, Dante’s speed increases manifold when he is fighting demons that push him further than he has ever needed to go before. Thus, it is reasonable to conclude that in addition to his nature, he needed the right stimulus to develop. From Dante’s movements (swordsmanship, hand-to-hand fighting, gunplay), it is clear that he possesses a very degree of skill in those areas. Since each successive game chronologically has him more powerful than the previous, it is likely his skills also develop with training and experience. His moves show good form, and several of them appear to be from actual martial arts. A fantastic example is what he does with various gauntlet/greave sets over the course of the series, showing a variety of techniques such as boxing jabs and uppercuts and kicks from tae kwon do and capoeira. This, of course, is mixed in with some good old fashioned brawling: double handed fists, ground slams, and more. In general, most of Dante’s fighting seems to be based on formal martial arts, but modified in keeping with his own experiences, and with his own personal flare added in.

This is interesting because my hypothesis is that Dante learnt to fight not by training under anyone, but by watching others fight, and using their moves in his own battles. His half demon body and demonic instincts would have helped him pick up the moves quicker and alter them to suit his own enhanced abilities.

Thus, the travelling Dante runs and hides, taking on foes when he feels he can win, and often even when he knows he will lose. Through a combination of skill and luck, he survives, and grows, getting stronger all the time.

A teenage Dante meets a woman named Nel Goldstein. At this time, Dante’s powers have surfaced to the point where regular guns cannot handle the stress he puts on them. He wrecks his weapons during every fight he gets into. Nel makes him a special pair of handguns, Ebony and Ivory, which are up to the task of handling his power, and they go on to become Dante’s signature prized ranged weapons. He is almost never seen without them in any game.

Nel Goldstein also dies shortly afterwards, and thus, Dante loses the second maternal figure in his life.

Dante is still in his teens at this point.

He has been killing demons in what seems like an endless war.

I often laugh when I see posts that call the original Dante edgy.

He was likely the most jaded teenager of all time. But there’s no time to feel sorry for oneself in a world where you either hunt or get hunted.

Converting his sorrow into rage, Dante continues on in his lone crusade. But he is cautious now. Behind his anger, the scars in his heart have hardened. He is afraid of getting close to someone, and losing them again. Thus, he armours himself in a shell of sarcasm and savage one-liners, a coat of self-deprecation and mocking jokes.


It is this weary late teenage Dante we meet in DMC 3, which is the earliest game in the series chronologically.

Of course, fate is not with the challenges she has in store for him.

His long lost brother, Vergil, is still alive, and has raised a tower in an attempt to open a gate to the demon world. His goal: to retrieve the blade in which Sparda sealed most of his power. To do so, he needs two things: his own half of the perfect amulet, and the one in Dante’s possession.

Dante has mixed feelings about his brother being alive.

They have not met in years, and their paths have made them vastly different, to the point where they are polar opposites.

If Dante is reckless, hot-blooded and devastating, preferring to overwhelm opponents with a barrage of sword swings and bullets, Vergil is calm, calculating and effective, choosing to methodically slice them to pieces with his signature katana.

They are the perfect foils for each other, and with their father’s power, and the fate of the human world at stake, they clash. Two different ways of life, two different souls at odds with each other, colliding.

This conflict is heartbreaking, since both those souls hold the same vision of perfect happiness.

Those eight flawless years they had as a family.

Gone, and never to return.

Those memories remain pristine in their hearts, but they have different ways of honouring it.

Vergil, consumed with regret at not being able to protect his mother, views his humanity as a weakness. He seeks his father’s power because he wants to become a full demon, thinking that eliminating his human emotion and replacing it with demonic power will finally allow him peace of mind.

Dante, on the other hand, has no clear goal other than vengeance. He hates his demon side, viewing demons as disgusting and hateful because they robbed him of his family. He also resents his father for leaving, going so far as to say at one point that “he has no father”.

During the events of the game, Dante meets a human woman, Mary.

Mary has family reasons of her own for being involved in the conflict. Her father, who also wishes to obtain Sparda’s power, had allied herself with Vergil. He had, in the past, killed his wife, Mary’s mother, in pursuit of demonic power, and Mart has come seeking the same thing as Dante: vengeance.

Through his meeting with her, Dante is forced to face all the things he had tried to close off his heart to.

In an amazing section of the game, you play as Dante as Mary, now christened Lady since she forsakes the name given by her father, fights Dante for the right to proceed further. Lacking the supernatural powers of her opponents, Mary must use an arsenal of weapons to keep up. But most importantly, she has cunning… and sheer, unyielding courage.

Dante is moved by her resolve, and for the first time, truly sees humanity as something other than a shackle.

Until now, having rejected his demon side, his humanity was simply the by-default remainder he was left with.

He now sees that there is worth in that humanity: courage, love and hope; the resolve to fight even when the odds are tough.

Dante embraces his humanity, and in doing so, finds a purpose that transcends vengeance.

Protecting humanity.

As he travels the tower, he faces opponent after opponent, many of whom had known Sparda. Having lost the first battle against Vergil, he was forced to draw on his demonic side’s power, achieving a full demon form for the first time. At this point, however, it is, to him, still a tool that he must use, and nothing more.

But his impression of his own father gradually changes from meeting the many demons who knew him.

Through their accounts, he can form a mental picture of the sort of person he must have been. A look at the Sparda he didn’t know.

And the moment he chooses to protect humanity, he realizes the significance of Sparda’s decision to do the same thing all those years ago.

He too had seen the worth of humanity.

This is when Dante inherits his father’s spirit. In finding, like him, something to fight and defend, he can relate to him. Being able to relate to the source of his demonic heritage means Dante can finally accept it.

Thus, when Dante and Vergil clash a final time, it is mature Dante who is unrecognizable from the tortured, angry teenager he was before. This is a Dante who has found a higher calling, has lived through trials and tribulations and developed a strong spirit. He has accepted his human emotions and his demonic power, and combined the strength of both.

He has already become the Legendary Dark Knight Dante.

Vergil, on the other hand, who started off more mature, has failed to grow.

In truth, his power was simply a way to protect himself. Desperately wanting family, and love, and having none of it, he compensates by desiring power, not allowing himself to acknowledge his true desire.

The heart-rending finale of the game has Vergil descend into the underworld. Having lost to Dante, he will not even allow himself to accept his failure. This is tragic when one realizes that this was a moment when Vergil could have simply gone back with Dante, and turned his life around.

Dante’s true goal, the perfect vision of happiness he has, is with Vergil, while Vergil’s own vision has Dante.

Years pass, and many things happen.


In the real world, fans of the series go through an eleven year wait for a game that seems it will never come.

But somehow, a miracle happens, and it does.


Devil May Cry 5 has an older Dante.

No matter the strength of his resolve, this Dante is simply tired of all the fighting.

His taunts are more subdued, his voice weary. Everything about his body language in the cutscenes shows that the years of taking on many burdens alone without having anyone he could truly relate to has taken its toll.

Here too, a miracle happens.

Somehow, Vergil has survived.

And the two have met again.

However, this time, Vergil has matured. Has learnt the value of his own humanity, and accepted his nature as both demon and human.

And there is now Nero to protect the human world.

At long last, Dante can pass on the burden to someone capable of carrying it.

And at long last, Vergil will allow himself to go after his true desire, and accept family and love, rather than thirst for power.

The game could very well have been called “Vergil’s Awakening”.

Both brothers have now ascended and inherited their father’s mantle and spirit, and are finally free to live together, in peace.

While still fighting all the time, of course.

The Librarian's Friend

There was once a castle

Whose library people came to see

From far and wide

Near and afar

The librarian was a remarkable woman

Who had dared to dye her hair blue

And who dared to be different

The library was like her child and

She tended to the books like a mother

One day a man came

Seeking a book

He chose a cosy nook in which

He would sit and read

Slowly they came to realize that

They shared similar tastes on literature

And loved the same authors

And it was this that brought them closer

The feisty librarian and the wanderer

 A friendship was forged

Then one day, this man had to leave

And he cried as he said goodbye to his friend

She gave him a book

Which he reads whenever he misses her

Funny thing memory

Something insignificant to us

May mean the world to someone else

As for her, whenever she misses him

She sits in the nook

And reads

The Bilge Master

Happy Birthday Kestrel

It was the fag end of a long day and I was bored. I'd heard of this site called Omegle, where you could meet strangers and without revealing your own identity, have conversations with them. I logged on.

After a few uninteresting chats, I found someone who didn't ask the usual "ASL?". I thought I was onto something and started talking. An hour and a half passed and I realized I had found someone intelligent at last. Then we swapped email IDs. She was in the US and I was in exotic India.

Believe me when I say my friendship with Kestrel, or as I call her K, started out with us swapping emails. In this day and age, there we were writing letters  to each other. It seemed to me to be a story that RK Narayan would have liked to write and there I was living it!

At the time, she was on Twitter and I was on Facebook. So we couldn't connect over social media just then because I saw no reason to create a Twitter account. So for almost a year and a half, these letters continued. I learnt that she was doing business administration, she liked her mom a lot and they would have wine dates from time to time and that she was in a band called LAOD with her friend Jenny. Not all our emails were beds of roses-we also shared problems we were having with each other. Again, in the age when letters were archaic, we were just two kids swapping emails. 

We had each other and somehow that was enough.

LAOD went on to compose a single called Storm and when it came out she excitedly sent me a link to hear it and I really liked it.

Then, someone told me that I would get a wider audience if I joined Twitter and so I did, just to promote my blog. I told her in an email that I had joined and she immediately replied that she was "off to follow me". Our emails dried up but we kept in touch through Twitter. Then she joined Facebook and we connected over Messenger.

I have known Kestrel Van Der Mark for over three years. She is sassy, confident, has a good voice, loves to play guitar and if you check out photos you'll find she does a lot of impromptu yoga. She is kind, helpful and adorable. If you ever do meet her be sure to notice that her smile lights up a room.

Today is her birthday. This is our story.

Here's looking at you Kestrel!

The Bilge Master